Alice in Please-Not-Tim-Burton Land

 I don't care what anyone says, Tim Burton's take on Alice in Wonderland was like watching two dogs hump, you didn't want to watch it... but you couldn't stop. Here's the test if you're going to survive a serious threat to human species:
    - if you liked Tim Burton's Alice in wonderland... congrats, you'll be dead.
    - if you're asking "Tim Burton made an Alice in Wonderland?", you're going to live. You're also going to live if you remember it, but thought it sucked so don't care wither way, which also includes every movie critic out there (LAWLZFAIL@Burton).

   Now, I'm writing about this because American McGee is coming out with Alice in Wonderland: Madness Returns, and you know what? It achieves everything Burton failed to do with tons writers, special effects teams, make-up artists, camera crews, high paid actors, and "dynamic" angles to try and bring back artistic value to the film (since the movie didn't have enough CG). This game brings darkness, gore, and monsters.

   Personally, I remember being a young girl and walking through game stores and seeing the first American McGee Alice game on the shelf and I was intoxicated by it... even just looking at the cover and reading the plot and everything that came with it, and you know what? It lived up to my tiny kid expectations of what the game should be like, and 10 years later?Here's the second one coming out, and just in the first part of 2011 (although other sites say Fall of 2011).

  This game continues with Alice being free from the Asylum and being relocated to some shrink... her mind goes crazy and she starts hallucinating, and ends up losing her mind by thinking about her parents "mysterious" death. So, what does she do? Probably what every normal... or crazy, person would do... she starts imagining her own little world in order to escape reality. And that world? Yeah, Wonderland. So.. her crooked imagination pretty much ruins her wonderland and everything in it, so she now has to fix it and make everything better. Yeah, yeah.. the plot doesn't sound all that exciting, but when the first game came out, it was known for amazing soundtracks and graphics that were completely ahead of it's time.
   Back then, computer games weren't really known for being graphically striking or the most amusing plot-wise... and McGee was kinda the one that went out there and really tried to create a good and long story that people could enjoy.. and he accomplished that. So am I excited? Hell yes.

   The game is going to be available on the PC, Xbox360, and PS3. If you have the PS3, I would recommend getting the game for that (if you're not a PC gamer) because with games coming out on the PS3, they're taking advantage of the space on the cds that xbox seems to lack now.

Popular Misconceptions

 There has always been false judgement on video gamers... from being a nerd, loner, and a loser to being a fat virgin living in their grandma's basement (and I mean at 40 years old, Collector's Edition Darth Vadar helmet and all)... and now the stereotypes today, from live gaming, has now pushed the envelope even further for misconceptions, especially for girl gamers.

  One example is that game developers think that their clientele is made up of sad, horny, teenage men. How else do you explain all the boobs you see in video games these days? I'm not joking, while surfing the internet for video game lists, there came up "Top 25 best boobs in video games". How sad do you have to be to sit there and literally study these images on your gaming console to make up a list?

  Now, if people's ignorant judgements were right, I'd be a 10yo boy who is also a 300lb girl... who just so happens to be lesbian.. which might be nice since I tried to find one on the internet and I couldn't find one, which would make me the first EVER!!! (I hate the multiple explanation marks, but this called for it).

 To actually demonstrate my point on how the guys perception on girl gamers is wrong, I'll be comparing girl gamers vs. guy gamers side by side.. while being completely unbiased (maybe).

The Girl Gamer:     
   Now, gamepro.com says that one student in some big whoopdy-doo university in Belgium did a study with over 900 people and found out that girls find video games "too complicated.. which, if I spent all 20 years of my life playing manegment games and The Sims, I would think that running around a random map and killing people would be slightly complicated too. But ofcourse, me growing up playing games like Zelda, Mario, and Goldeneye 007 has prepared me to play something like CoD and has taught me to atleast explore the map and to know the guns before I just go out there and "wing it".. so, we'll just ignore that study and say that it was completely pointless to hand someone something they know nothing about, and expect them to be able to figure it out and master it in what was most likely 30 minutes of gameplay.

   Here's the awesome news, according to Entertainment Software Association, 25% of console players, and 39% of gamers on the PC are women... and that was in 2004. In today's society, female gamers that are 18+ make up 34% of gamers completely. That's like.... for every 3 guys, there's 1 and a half girl. And sure, some girl gamers are horrible, trust me.. I've played with several other girls and have even been a part of some all-girl clans, and some girls are just flat out horrible but not once have I ran into the stereotypical "fat and ugly" girl gamer.

 Honestly, I know guys just throw insults like "you're fat" because they feel completely emasculated by a female who has more talent at video games than they do.. but if I was fat, I would not be able to move my thumbs that fast in order to kill you over 10 times, let alone the rest of your sad, sad team.

 The Guy Gamer:

   Hey fellas, ever wonder why game developers make the main guy character so scrumdiddlyumptious? Because they feel like you all look like this guy, and you need an aesthetically pleasing model to look up to... after all, the main character in games is daring, smart, sexy, brave, and ambitious... and it's their very special way of telling you "hey you! you suck! Now be amazed by this character that you're being forced to play, and be in awe of the things he can do that you could only wish of! Mwuahahah!". Seriously... that's what they do, they have board meetings for this sort of thing, why? Because NO ONE wants an ugly superhero. Look at Quasimodo from the Huntchback of Notre Dame... did he get Esmerelda? No, no he did not.. even if he loved her.. instead, she fell for the gorgeous Captain Phoebus who she probably knew for 3 seconds.

Now, I'm not dissing this guy on any level, but you know what? I don't know how many times I've had some jerk on the 360 call me fat and ugly, and I counter-insult him and he tells me to look him up on facebook... and what do I do? I look him up on facebook and have a good chuckle to myself at the fact that I was able to call off his bluff, and trust me.. this has happened on more than a few occasions. Now, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention say that the average gamer is 35 years of age, overweight, aggressive, introverted, depressed... and male. Another study shows that games usually are marketed towards men because they fulfill the deep-rooted urge in order to conquer and dominate (click here to read).

   Now, I'm not trying to stir the pot or fuel the fire when it comes to stereotypes... and I know every gender and race has it's stereotypes... but come on people, this isn't the 1500's. Technology isn't what it used to be anymore.. time to update the human species and the way we consider things.

 

Like this guy.

'scuse me, broke ass coming through.

 I've decided to write on the account that I'm bored, there's nothing to do, and I'm not waiting until I buy a game in order to write a blog entry, why? Because I'm broke! Unless you count the money I have in my savings... but that's for a down payment on a house (seriously, my boyfriend won't let me touch it).

 So I've went to http://www.ign.com/ and have looked at the next 10 years of games which are coming out and there seems to be some good promises and then some that kind of just hit me like a giant speeding truck of "wth?".

Driven by this guy.

   The 5 Best Upcoming Games 2010-2011 (according to me)

   5. Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood (Release Date: November 16, 2010)

          Assassin's Creed is taking it's third adventure through one of my want-to-go-to places, Rome, Italy.... mmm.. I can smell the canolli's and lobster tail pastries from here. Now, I honestly can't say too much about this game because I completely blind sighted myself of not finishing the first game in order to write this because of my love for Italy and all things italian... so, I watched my boyfriend play the first Assassin's Creed and the second one, yeah... consider me a cheater, but the cool thing about this game is that this time around, there's going to be a multiplayer layer where you can pick your own character that has their own signature weapon AND assassination technique... and wait, there's more. After accomplishing different tasks within the game, you will be able to recruit people in for doing assignments around Europe or even helping you out with different cases you'll be doing.

         And the best thing for me? The fighting style is different, instead of going and counter attacking the hell out of people who just say "hey you!" for no reason, having the first strike is key in this game... which means I'll be having a ton of fun with this one, since my boyfriend yells at me constantly that all I do is press buttons and "you can't do that!". Visually, this game is jaw dropping... it's like watching a postcard having a side show of what Italy would look like in 1500 AD. And the worst part? I would recommend for EVERYONE to buy this on the PS3, even though the 360, PS3, and the PC get to witness the awesomeness of multiplayer for this game, PS3 is the only system that has the multiplayer BETA actually enabled... and ofcourse that's only if you have the PS3 anyway, I don't expect anyone to go out and buy a PS3 just for this game.


   4. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 (Release Date: TBA)

        So.. there's bad news and go-... no, no good news, just bad news. Bad news number 1: So far it's only for the PS3 (according to ign.com). Bad news number 2: Infinity Ward was fired and now there's a whole lawsuit (between Activision and Infinity Ward) that is in the way of the game pre-production. Bad news number 3: I'm not happy... they need to think about the fans and the gamers and put their legal disputs aside and focus on their work, and while I'm right here while the game is still in progress, whoever is making the game now better be making it harder to create noobtubes. It was fine in CoD: WaW because people actually had to WORK in order to noobtube, now... it's like it's handed out, especially since in MW2 it's pretty much one of the beginner classes. I understand it's the gaming world but atleast encourage people to have some dignity instead of letting them run around like complete asses.

 3. L.A. Noire (Release Date: November 1, 2010)

        Ever since I read about this in Game Informer, I've been excited and jumping for joy about this game, and that's not an expression that I just throw around either.

       "L.A. Noire blends action, detection and complex storytelling and draws players into an open-ended challenge to solve a series of gruesome murders. Set in a perfectly recreated Los Angeles before freeways, with a post-war backdrop of corruption, drugs and jazz, L.A. Noire will truly blend cinema and gaming." - Rockstar Games

  See? That's not something someone can just lie about. Sure, I can write.. kinda, I've always had an on-off relationship with writing, but NO ONE can make something sound so good and not believe in it themselves. One thing I worry about with Rockstar games is that they ugly it up too much. GTA was and is a popular series, but there's only so many times you can follow someone through their relationship falls, drug problems, and Gay Tony expeditions before it gets boring and repetitive, and like I said about Mafia 2, it was a standard third-person shooter with a good emotionally-gripping plot... but it's repetitive, and this being L.A. Noire, sure..I expect some repeating, no duh, especially if it's a third-person shooter, but I hope they don't follow GTA to much and I hope they give the plot and story line some dignity (instead of drowning it with drugs) and really stick to the tradition and classiness that really defined the 40's.

  2. Dragon Age 2 (Release Date: March 8, 2011)

      This is one of those games I would recommend completely, and luckily for everyone, it comes out on the PS3, 360, and PC.. so everyone should buy it, thankyou. The last game was exciting, it's one of those things I didn't get to beat but.... I didn't have to beat it in order to enjoy the plot and what the game gave as a whole. This game follows the last game.. it takes place 10 years after the ending of the first game, but because the creators are so smart, they made it so that you really didn't have to beat (or play) the first game in order to pick up on the story line. Now I've heard people complain that they're annoyed it took 7 years to create the first game and only 2 years to create the second one, and personally... I'm not bothered. In this game, players will be able to somewhat customize the character and make them look how they want them to look, as well as also creating their characters classes. Another accepted difference in the game is that you can pause within battle and change the battle tactics and what approach you decide to take as far as killing foes is concerned.. although for me, I just kept pushing buttons.. I was a mage also since I didn't feel like dealing with the whole "sword" thing either.
   You'll still be able to give presents to your party members (although not as much as the first game), and still be able to create some romances, so I really don't think we're going to be missing as much as some people think we will (since most games try to out-do themselves as they continue to create games).
     The story line is excellent... you play as this person named Hawke who is this refugee, and you control them through saving and slaying things to the position of what is, Dragon Age's most important person, or warrior.. give or take. And sure, that doesn't seem like much of a storyline, but who honestly doesn't appreciate the zero-to-a-hero concept?


    1. Call of Duty: Black-Ops (Release date: November 9, 2010)

       I think everyone saw this coming, especially since I'm pretty much a CoD extremist, I'm even wearing my CoD sleepy pants my boyfriend bought for me for our first Valentine's Day as I'm typing this.

   So Black-Ops, which was produced by Treyarch (which was produced by Activision for those who don't know), is having a big amount of expectations... especially from me since Treyarch's World at War is what made me fall in love with the Call of Duty series anyway, and from what I see... there's a ton of good, good things that's in stores for the gamers. You can customize your class more and really react to the maps... and the better news? There's different game modes. For those who can't connect their xbox to live, there's a game mode you can play that allows "multiplayer" game play with characters who have artificial intelligence in order to mimic online gaming. "Wager", another game mode is where you get to gamble (because scratch-offs aren't enough for minors these days) CoD points and either double your bet or lose the whole kaboodle. "One in the chamber" is where you have one bullet, and if you miss? Time to break out the big guns because you're going to be kissing some jaws with that fist. "Gun Game" is where you have a gun, and the more kills you get the better your gun gets... you die? Well, you start from the beginning.
     Another great thing about this game is the perks, even on the guns. This time around you have motion sensors, UAV jammers (which is like Scrambler), and cameras to spy on enemies.. - wait.. what? Not sure if I like that... I know a ton of people are going "WHOOOO! YEAH!" and they're probably the same people that run around throwing C4's at people and shooting them, noobtubing, or running around with the Knifer's Class... not sure how I feel about it.. but we'll see how to turns out, and if it's bad.. then you know I'll be ranting about it right on here.
    One of the things I loved about MW2 is the fact that you can select what your killstreaks were from a huge varity... and in Black-Ops, they're going to continue that... and then some, and "some" includes gunships, exploding remote control cars, napalm strike, heavy turrents, and a mortar team. And you'd think I'd be done right now with what all the new features are, but there's MORE (this is why I love Treyarch, or competing companies anyway.), you can now engrave your name into your gun, and you can really customize your title and emblem along with your UserName.

 All that said, I'm excited and I'm already hooked.


 P.S. I don't play Halo... therefore it's not on the list.

How in the world..?

 Most people just call me Syn... and I'm disorganized and not very good with following through with ideas and quite honestly, this is one of those things where I woke up (quite angry) and just decided that I was going to do something.. despite my short attention span and unwillingness of finishing things.

 What led me to this idea was the fact that everytime I decide to get into a CoD (Call of Duty for those unsavy) lobby, people decide that they would rather believe that a talking unicorn is communicating with them rather than a female who is even slightly decent at video games... no boys, girl gamers exist... the pot you decided to smoke 2 days ago is not messing with your brain.

 I'm also here to share some insight of video games.. from something that isn't realistic to what the people behind the game should actually be focusing on.

This week (or for now..) the game is...

Everyone knew it was coming.

Mafia 2
Rating: 7.5/10

  While the gaming experience was overall so realistic... it's frustrating that the game was so short, it literally took me 12.5 hours to complete, and sure... I play games like this on Easy so I don't have to get blinded by my own frustration of dying to completely deny the excellence of the plot. Visually, it was exciting. The interaction with the police and the people around you and what you can do in the game, like what you eat can effect you and you can bribe the police, it was genius. However, the ending could've been better and more job opportunities would've been nice... as fun as robbing stores and crushing cars is, I would've liked being a taxi driver and listening to the soundtrack.. seriously, because of the game I now have a new age iPod filled with music from a century ago. Another plus was the fact that you really got to follow Vito's (main character) life and be able to connect more emotionally to this character than previous 2K characters... you got to follow him in the war, when he went home to his family, before he was in the mob, while he was in jail, and then while he was working up the mob ladder and doing jobs I don't even think Al Capone would even get near.

....but for a certain price

  I wish they would've stuck with the idea of having four alternate endings instead of just keeping the one ending because "it was so much better", it would've increased the idea of replaying the game over and over again, instead of just playing it once and then going back to GameStop just to trade it in for something like Heavy Rain. Also, everyone knows that Playboy is a HUGE piece of Americana... it's the reason why America has been so great since 1953... - wait, what? 1953? But in the game you're collecting the magazines in the 1940's, so yeah.. that's another flaw. I wish they would've brought in something realistic to the time that was collectible, like baseball cards, or comic books... even though when you think of the Mafia you think of tailored suits, money, and classy girls surrounding you, so baseball cards don't even have any room in that suave cocktail.. oh well. One other thing I don't like as well is that unless you focus on the challenges, you might be stuck with the game at 71% complete.

  Like I said, Mafia 2 was a standard 3rd-person shooter, so you're focusing more on plot and the plot was amazing, lead by awesome graphics (unless you have the PS3 version, they cut out some details in order to make room for video frame, according to wiki)... short game play time for $60. The ending left some room open for interpretation and a possible beginning for Mafia 3 which that could be exciting depending on how much Mafia 2 makes and if the developers are interested in continuing the story on a deeper level. I would recommend this game to those who like the GrandTheftAuto series, who are into 30-50's America, or who are just interested in things related to the mob.