The Worlds Worst Best Video Game Awards (2010)

   Whooooo! It feels great to be alive, for the past week and so days, I have been kidnapped by goats and taken to the Mountain of Taumata­whakatangiha-whatever, just know that it's a mountain in NZ and these goats have cut open my body and fed it to their carnivorous children.. which I guess you can call "kids"... God, what a great world we live in. Anyway, it's great to be back and although I did promise myself to never... ever... write an End-of-the-year Awards thing, well.. I guess promises are made to be broken, so here it is.

   Let's start off the evening (or morning.. or night.. whatever) with..
(I apologize ahead of time for parenthesis and ellipses..)


            Best Video Game Story:
     Nominations:
         Alan Wake
        Dragon Age: Origins
        Fable 3
        Heavy Rain
        Red Dead Redemption

            
     To many people this may be a surprise, trust me... I was going back and forth between this and Red Dead Redemption, and many people can say that RDR deserved to win this, but you know what? Heavy Rain was a great game with a great story, and this year... it completely went under the radar unnoticed. Yes, while RDR brought something fresh to the table, Heavy Rain brought suspence, psychological challenges, it kept you stimulated and wanting more.. without knowing what came next, without knowing "okay, I have to go here and do this", it was surprise after surprise after surprise and it was a game that pulled at you mentally and emotionally.
      For those who haven't heard of it, you're missing out.. and so are people who don't have PS3s because this game is only for PS3. But I recommend this game to everyone who loves a great suspenseful game, I mean.. you think Alan Wake is good? This is better, and it doesn't matter if you're playing it or watching someone else play it because you get attached no matter what.


            Best Graphics:
      Nominations:
        Alan Wake
        Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood
       Dragon Age: Origins
       Final Fantasy XIII
       Red Dead Redemption
       Heavy Rain
       Mafia II
 
           
     Again, this was a really hard decison.. you had the dreamy world of Final Fantasy vesus the rugged realism of Red Dead Redemption, and RDR won by the hair on it's chest... from John Marston's stubble, to the scratches in the wood frame of the barn and everything else... the visual aspects of this game has flirted with the lines of reality to the point of making me think I was personally pulling guns on people and seeing some... "personal pleasures" going on... in other words.. it was like being at a distant cousins wedding (don't lie to yourself, we all have that cousin somewhere). But the work that went into the graphics of the game has added such a unique feel in gaming.. sure, the theme of the game and being out in the old west was exciting and new, but how can you really feel like you're back in that setting with not even seeing a single tumbleweed? Exactly.. and this game doesn't leave you feeling like you left out on an experence that your ancestors have achieved. By far the best game from Rockstar we've seen yet.


            Best Voice Acting:
     Nominations:
          Alan Wake
        Mafia II
        Enslaved: Odyssey to the West
 
       
   While I do not think Alan Wake was the best game as far as gameplay goes, the story and the attention to detail - both visual and verbal - were outstanding,... you could feel the sadness and fear in the voices of the characters.. you could sense the urgency of everything that was going..  it was like an ASPCA commercial and the words in the game was the angelic voice of Sarah McLachlan, so in short.. the developers of this game did everything right.. they sent people in the middle of the woods with tents and a recorder and made sure everything was dead accurate... and because of dedication and the total result, this has to get the best voice acting. You felt everything that the developers would want you to feel and it's amazing when something like a game can offer that emotional connection.


            Favorite Character:
      Nominations: 
          Dragon Age - Morrigan
        Mafia II - Vito Scaletta
        Red Dead Redemption - John Marston
        Final Fantasy - Lightning

        
  This one would be a tad bit obvious to my readers because hey, here at the-girl-gamer, we, or I.. love anything about the mob, and Vito and his buddy Joe have entertained me beyond any expectation I've had from even just hearing the word "Mafia". From Vito's tough and serious personality with Joe's carefree and nonchalant attitude, it makes for the perfect combo.. like Pretzels with Ice Cream, and these personalities mixed together just don't give you a great video game experience, it makes you feel like you're laughing with buddies...if you're buddies are in the Mafia anyway.


            Best Soundtrack:
      Nominations:  
         Red Dead Redemption
        Mafia II
        Rock Band 3
 
    
    I know what you guys are thinking "RDR had a great soundtrack", and yes! I agree.. I loved the two songs that was played at epic parts of the game, but it didn't make me download those songs.. however, I downloaded the songs from Mafia 2 and not only played, but sang the songs over my headset as I was playing CoD.. oh yes... that was me singing "That's Amore"... and don't lie, you all loved it. Now.. this game had *the best* soundtrack out of any game of this genre.. even beats Rockstar games that follow the same game play... you may not agree.. but the music made me feel at ease, relaxing, and it was just fun and got you in a great mood. I didn't even mind Joe's voice when he was singing a Dean Martin song.. it's just that good and really sets you in a great mood.


            Game of the Year:
      Nominations:     
         Alan Wake
        Call of Duty: Black-Ops
        Halo: Reach
        Red Dead Redemption
       
     Yeah... this was obvious.. I mean, come on, Game Informer even wrote an article about how it was "soo perfect", one of the writers couldn't even finish the game. From the details, to voice acting, to different missions, adventures, mini-games, and DLC, it's no wonder why everyone raves about this game over mics and forums.. seriously, if everyone played this game, it would end all wars.. because they'd be so exhausted from shooting everyone in sight, no one would want to kill eachother, although I'm sure most people disagree, no one cares about their opinion, why? Because this game is great. It's new, it's fresh... sure, it offers everything Rockstar stands for (prostitutes, drugs and alcohol.. or should I say every straight-edge kid's nightmare?), but it shines everything in a different light. Instead of playing deadbeat with a quick rags-to-riches plan, you're playing the early out-west American Dream, and what could be better? Nothing.


       Disclaimer: This is just my opinion... if you want to disagree, feel free to take advantage of that right, just don't take advantage of the right to be a big-mouthed moron... that is all.

11/11/11

    Besides this date being my personal prediction for the Apocalypse,  The Elder Scrolls: Skyrim (fifth in the series) is being released. Oh yes.
You know what this means? I have less than a year for saving up X amount of money for this game, Assassin's Creed Brotherhood (still, and don't expect me to write a review, it's too late), Call of Duty Sledgehammer, L.A. Noire, the new Dragon Ages, and whatever other games have to push themselves in my direction.




     So Skyrim is a region in the Elder Scrolls that is home of the Nords.
   (for those who forgot who the Nords were, they're the most human-looking out of all the different races. They're great at sailing, and anything that as to deal with a blade and a shield.. trust me, if you want close-combat, this is the race to go for in the game)
Skyrim is the most rugged area on the continent and also contains the five highest points in Tamriel, so we can expect to see some wonderful snow scenery there. However, if you're like me... you're not looking foreword to having your character climb up mountains and seeing through mesh objects and eventually getting stuck, so here's the good news, other than peaks that cover the eastside, the rest of Skyrim is vertical, with... lakes and normal stuff.




    - Places to Mention:
 Haafingar: Home of Bards' College and also one of Skyrim's chief ports.
 Windhelm: Was once the capitol of the first empire.
 Throat of the World: Highest mountain in Skyrim and highest point in Tamriel aside from Red Mountain.

New Addiction..

     Hey guys! God, it feels nice to be back in my room and on this laptop... like old times. Anywho, I haven't been on for awhile (obviously), and why? Well, who cares... but I've been addicted to Angry Birds. Yes, I've got into the lil birdie craze after listening to so much Elvis Duran. Now, for those who don't know what Angry Birds is..




  
      There you go. It's a strategic game that is phone-based. You can get it on android-technology phones, iPhones, iPads, and other smart phones and sorts. The game is free and and most importantly - awesome. Now... with Christmas around the corner, people are looking for the best deals with anything, even games, and this game is the best deal you can get, unless you're printing a coupon for a PS3 and a few games for 5 bucks (oh yes, I've seen them), is this Angry Birds game. Seriously, for Christmas, tell your friend to just download this game and give them a $15 gift card for MapleStory or Walmart.

      Now, in the game, you launch a series of birds (that when you click on them while they're floating in mid-air, they have powers/abilities) in order to save eggs from a bunch of evil pigs that are protected by varies materials.. (wood, glass, stone). While the score to reach appears to be at such a high standard, it's insanely addicting and even if you're losing, you don't mind it because it's just that fun.

    
       I gotta give this game a 8.75/10. It's a perfect game for it's genre, but the fact that it can be insanely hard to reach the score limit is just insane.. I can get over 70,000 on a level an not beat it, so t's slightly exhuasting, which.. yes... adds to the addiction factor, but like I said, everyone... download this game.

The Got-to-Grab Thing of December

      Now, I figured that I was going to start a Got-to-Grab gaming item/s of the month, and I guess this really wasn't the month to do it.. yeah...  all gamers know that most publishers don't have games come out directly in December because theres extra stuff going on and they want to meet release demands as well as holiday demands and there's no sense in just going out and releasing games all over in December... so, the item of the month?

        World of Warcraft : Catacylsm

 Release: December 7
 Type: Expansion Pack
 For: Mac OS X, Windows

     For the longest time I tried to convince myself to not write about World of Warcraft since I never had the chance to play it... but here it is. This is going to most likely be the "have to have" game/expansion of the month of December, if you don't have it... you're a loser, even by gamer standards. Now, this is the third expansion for the series an it offers some pretty cool new things. It has a redesign of the Eastern Kingdoms and Kalimdor. There's going to be new missions (about 3,500) and different starting areas depending on the race of your character. The level cap has been raised (80 to 85), new towns, seven new dungeons including two previously released, three new raids, new battlegrounds, a new skill (archeology), new zones, new races which also include new race/class combos. Personally? I'm excited now.. and who knows? Maybe I'll just put that gaming computer to use.
    I think this is great.. I always get worried about games and replay value, but you never hear of this game growing old, and especially when developers keep right on top of it and offer a variety of new stuff.


     

Videogameplasty..?

    So I was watching Bridalplasty or whatever new show there is that has brides getting plastic surgery in order to compete for a – wait for it… - wedding of their dreams! Mind you, these aren’t fat chicks either… although one was on The Biggest Loser, it’s nothing that a mile run in the morning couldn’t fix. Well… because I know that these girls are going to look worst in the end rather than good (and even if they don’t, their personalities are horrible), I figured I would write a list of those characters that went under the knife and came back… odd..




    Now sadly, the list contains some all-time classic favorites and ofcourse, some others. Let’s have a look of the finishing look, shall we?



Crash Bandicoot



    I hate to say this… but who is that re-re to the right? It looks like what would be Crash Bandicoot in the 90’s if he wasn’t already there in the 90’s… you look at the first character, he’s simple, built looking, and ready for an adventure that would make Indiana Jones blush. The one on the right? The graphic artists, or “the aesthetic experts of the gaming industry”, pretty much screwed him up, and I wouldn’t go on an adventure with that creep if the game was given 10/10 stars. The pants and the pose shows he’s trying to be “culturally hip”, and the way he the lacing in his shoes shows he’s off-beat and doesn’t follow the beat of everyone’s drum, the goofy expression is supposed to be a slap in the face of “fun goofy guy with the rad hair you want” , a make-over that didn’t need to be done, but was done based on the fact that the developers thought that kids would be more attracted to this character. Morons.



Legend of Zelda – Link




    I understand that the impostor to the right to suppose to be for the DS version... but seriously... since when does Link wear eye liner and look like something that hopped out of NickJr? Umm.. never, the dude slays spiders and can fight, atleast I hope so, he's been doing it since 1987? This is.. or was one of my favorite characters until the DS got a hold of it.. those who love Link are more likely to have known him back in the 80's and the kiddos (like me) know him on the N64... we watched him grow up and go through childhood and manhood collecting details and pixels throughout his life.. and it took one idiot system to take it all away. You take a giant leap over the Grand Canyon and you get pushed all the way back by a termite.. the DS being the termite..


    Every Popular Game - Mario


 

      What the hell, Japan? What did you do!? Look at his face! You could bounce a brick off that baby. While old Mario consists of about.. 5 pixels and is only 2D, I like him better. You don't have to focus on lame expressions or being distracted by how many hairs are in his mustache.. everything is simple, and the game has insane replay value (even today, it's a classic). Marios games these days? They sell, but there's about 8million different series, and even more than 1,000 games in each series.. seriously, how many Mario Parties are there? I don't know, I haven't been to them all because they keep getting pumped out like cow milk... from an immortal cow. I understand times are going to keep going, graphics are going to get... "better" and characters are going to get make-overs, but is a mega-botox injection needed every year?




   BanjoKazooie


  So.. I guess I'm just realizing that Kazooie is a girl, which is fine, nothin' wrong with that, but when did Banjo freakin' join the Jersey Shore Whore cast? When did he get the giant bangs sticking out of his head? I guess bears just like growing out their hair and having it spiked a yard away from their head. These guys kinda put me in a bad mood now.. if I play this game, I'm ready for an adventure, oh yes... but Kazooie looks miserable and Banjo looks like he's more interested in playing a ukulele and smoke a banana leaf soaked with steroids. A better make-over would've been nice.. the game is about adventure and fun, Kazooie doesn't need to look sultry-ish and Banjo.. he looked better before.


     Waluigi




     Why yes,that is a blank space right next to an photo of a horrible looking character made by.. Nintendo. Now, while I'm sure all gamers can come together and say "there's a list of characters that should have never been created", this guy makes the list, because from an aesthetic stand-point (which is what this post is about), he would've looked more attractive by not existing.. seriously, the word would be a happier place. This character got made because the big shots at Nintendo thought Wario needed a partner in a game.. you know what I would have done? I would've saved money by not having Wario in the game and dodging the concept of creating a character that NO ONE cares about, and probably a character that most people have never even heard of in the first place. Wario is stupid enough.. there doesn't need to be two of him. End of story.


     I wish companies who have characters that are loved (by millions) would put out a poll, or even a contest to have people decide what the character should look like. No one wants to see a cartoon Link, no one wants Pedo-Mario staring them down. And I've seen other lists like this.. who have Bomberman and Street Fighter characters, and while they're HUGE transformations, they're not that bad... although Bomberman kinda got murdered and had some mechanical weirdo take his place, but oh well.

Syn's Late-Thanksgiving Special

    Alright, so I'm a tad bit late on writing an article, but you know what? I have a life also... which consisted of everyone coming over my house for the holidays so I have been running around like crazy trying to keep the house clean, cooking, and baking... and laundry.. yeah, I know.. some life.

  Anywho, I was thinking, "Thanksgiving.. what can I write about?". And I had several ideas, one took up too much time writing about so I just completely ditched the concept.. and then another one was completely boring, I'm not excited about doing this because it seems like every writer who writes about video games is doing something like "Top 10 Games I'm Thankful for", and while it sounds cliche and overbearing because NO ONE cares about what these idiots are thankful for.. I still decide to hop on the idiot bus.

`                             



   Please Note: I agree with people that are getting tired of reading lists of whatever on my site, and I also find that I am getting tired of writing them. I still didn't get Assassin's Creed, probably won't until.. after Christmas or whichever because 1) I'm broke. 2) Not enough time during the day to play at the moment. 3) I'm working a new job.. I leave at 6:30am and come back at 6:30 pm, make dinner, then go to bed.. I feel miserable that I can't even go to the gym, so deal with me for awhile.


  Games I am Thankful For:
  Dance Dance Revolution (DDR) :: Now, not only is this game the reason why I will have arthritis in my knees by the time I'm 30, but this game is the very well reason why we have games like Guitar Hero.. which ofcourse is why we have Rockband, and I'm not a fan of that, but everyone else is so I have to deal with it. Now, this is one of my all time favorite games..you can play on the dance pad, you can use the controller, it increases hand-eye coordination, it helps with people working out, it's just a great game in general and it really pioneered some of the most popular games today.

  Super Mario World :: Now, the Mario franchise is an exhausting one and it's one that most game writers are not fond of (game informer..), but I love it. For me, it was the game of the 90's. I grew up with Mario, I watched him grow up also from a tiny pixel boy to a super 3D HD wonder. And without him, the Wii would probably not be making the sales it does now.. or did.

   Pokemon :: Really.. what needs to be said? Pikachu was like.. Mouse of the 90's and Charizard is everyone's favorite overgrown lizard/dinosaur. P.S. Not talking about the card game..

   GoldenEye 007 :: For me, this was the game that pioneered shooter games as well as Duke Nukem.. and those who disagree.. you can disappear back to the 80's and not come back. GoldenEye had the graphics and it was one of those games that really started the gaming age, to me anyway. I have the most and best memories playing this game with my family and everything about the game was amazing.. made me buy another N64 years ago... even though it's broken.. but this game is why there's a Halo and Call of Duty.

   Petz :: Now, many people don't know about Catz or Dogz, but I believe this is what started the whole virtual pet phenomonononon. You got to breed them, have little puppiez and kittenz, you got to train them, design your own playrooms. And, they also had another game - Babiez.. which was equally fun, but I'm more of a puppy-person.




   The Sims :: I know some people may not agree.. but I say.. and anyone can quote this,"The Sims is the Godfather of Simulation Gaming - AesthetikSyn/the-girl-gamer.blogspot.com" and that's the truth. Ever since I was 10 I was playing this game and it's addicting. I don't know how many families I tore apart and created.. I don't even know how many kids I've created, but... The Sims is one game that I don't think is really going anywhere, and I think that developers are going to have one hell of a time trying to create a game like this without it getting bashed and having Sims thrown in its face. It's a great game on life without stupid repetitions.. also, it's the best-selling PC game in history.. just thought I would add that awesome detail. And March 2011 - Sims Medievil release.



      Games That Should Just Be Mentioned:
  Mario Kart Racing - Without it, my childhood would be boring.

  Pacman - His habit of consuming everything is amusing.. and without him, I'd be rich.

  Final Fantasy - While I didn't personally grow up playing this game, the graphics are amazing, the story is awesome, and the series has been going on for such a long time, it deserves some Kudos.

  Duke Nukem - I don't love aliens or anything that has to do with aliens, but I sure as hell loved blowing them up in this game.

 Street Fighter - As old and successful as it is/was, it had to contribute something to the gaming society.

 Starfox - One of the best selling games on the N64, and had one of the worst sequels (yeah, it had a sequel..), may you Rest in Peace..

 Tetris - Thanks to you, I can organize boxes like no one's business.

 Legend of Zelda - I enjoyed you while you lasted.. R.I.P. Ocarina of Time & Majora's Mask (except the ending.. that was horrible.)

 Dungeons and Dragons - You're old, and you were great.. and there's still people out there that love you.

 World of Warcraft - Happy almost 10th Birthday and congrats on creating crazy teens who beat up their parents when their parents take you away from them. <3


   Note: This is obviously for the "older" games, or ones that I just grew up playing and growing to love, or even games that are just loved by tons, if you don't agree because you don't see "Fallout" or "Halo" on this list, grow hairs on your chest and then we'll talk (same goes for COD fanboys.)
 

L.A. Noire - emotion: Excited.

   First off, I don't have Assassin's Creed yet because I've been running around like crazy.. not a finacial issue, but just alot in my life is going on between my parents, redoing the house and also Thanksgiving (which for the first time is at my house so I'm nervous). So, I figured I would do an article on... da da da daaaaaaa - L.A. Noire.




     I know, I know.. I'm so late for this, but doesn't this look great?
  Look at all the details, the L.A. Times building, the cars, the facial features and such detail during the lip synching. This is one game I'm excited for because it's the black sheep of crime games, instead of you being on the wrong side of the law, you're on the right side of the law and solving crimes with clues and talking to different suspects, I'm excited.

   Now the game is to be released in mid 2011.. which sucks that they now threw the game out there really early because we, as consumers, have to wait a longer time period.. which.. could fail, I believe releasing too much info too early could instead ruin a game because people find out too much of what is going on and then lose interest. But anyway, the game was intented to be released for only the PS3, but then changed to being also available for the Xbox360.

   The game takes place in the 1940's LA (obviously..) so, already I'm looking foreward to seeing any Italian Mob references (Jack Dragna), and yes... LA had an Italian mob, not as great as New York, Philly, or Chicago though, but I hope to see something with that. They should also include something with Elizabeth Short (The Black Dahlia), different celebrities and and dirty life of corruption, maybe something with the government thrown in there and different politics. 

    Are you excited? I'm excited. It just sucks that this game comes out in.. 9 months? And, there's the chance it could be delayed
  -sigh-
    

Call of Duty: What is Next?

 I know that Black-Ops was just released.. but I can't help thinking: What's next?
I got this idea from surfing around on GameInformer and someone had written a blog about what could come next in the CoD Series, and the guy had several ideas, so.. I figured I would write some of my own ideas.. maybe some coming from him and some I'm just thinking would be interesting.


    Civil War:
 All COD games seem to revolve around USofA, so why not do a game that shows the USA completely at a battle with itself? Sure, there would be some minor controversy with the campaign or the game itself I can imagine, because of what the Civil War started from, but I think it would be an interesting concept and it would allow the developers to really have a great campaign and story.

    Revolutionary War: Our country started with angry farmers and pitchforks against an army with heavy ammunition. Why not have a game that shows the struggles America had when it was just starting? Ofcourse, it would have to be very close to true events so that us history buffs could have something to oogle over.. but I think it would be interesting to play and even interesting to see what kind of story they give the game.

    Napoleonic Wars:
 Napoleon Bonaparte was a hit-or-miss kinda guy... when he won, he won big, when he lost.. he lost everything. I think it would be awesome to follow Napoleon through battle and to see his struggles with England and having Russia thrown into the mix on top of trying to rule his country. In Black-Ops you see JFK making commands, so why not live an adventure with Napoleon in and out of his battles?

    Benito Mussolini: As you guys know, I love all things italian.. so brace yourselves. Mussolini was an Italian politician who is like the Godfather of Fascism. Now, I think this in an interesting concept because you do have Hitler thrown in here who practically kissed Mussolini's ass every second of every day.. so it would be awesome to see that relationship between the two.. but, it would take place and tie in WW2, and that would kinda repeat WorldAtWar, but who cares? It was a great game. But we could also see some italian mob references and how they influenced government, which would just create such a great story.

    Blood Diamonds:  I was watching something on tv about Blood Diamonds and Africa, and it was about this one person going in and looking for diamonds and becoming a victim of war and this gang dictator (I forget his name).. but the story was so interesting and I could watch that documentary over and over again. This is a great concept because it shows the gangs that Africa has and what is going over there as far as politics and different corruption, as well as war.. and it leaves so much room for interpretation and story.

    Third-World:  Don't know how many third-world countries there are, but I know there's a lot... and I'm sure there's some that we don't even know exist. I think it would be cool to see the wars they have with eachother, struggles of food, health, sanity, while I'm sure they wouldn't make it too realistic because these are topics that can be a bit sensitive.. it's a great idea.. the weapons would be hard to figure out, but it would make an interesting game.

    Dracula and the Ottomans:  This is something you learn in history class for a week and then completely forget. Vlad the Impaler is such an interesting person... I think anyway, and it would be great to see the battle between him and the Ottomans.. this is a guy who killed 40,000-100,000 people during 1400's, and in sick and sadistic ways. Yeah, it's a great concept, I don't think it would transfer well to a game that's so widely played because it would be very dark and gruesome... but he's an interesting figure and if you don't know about him, look him up.

    G.I. Jane: This would really have to depend on the game and where it would take place... but they need to add a female character. I don't know how many other girls I meet while playing this game... but there's tons of them out there who love COD just as much I d- no... no one could love this game more than I do.. but maybe they enjoy it almost as much as I do. So I think a female character would be nice and I know it would be very appreciated.

   Subscription Fees: Now.. I'm not looking forward to this, but the article I read said that paying a fee in order to play multiplayer isn't too unrealistic. First off... Bobby Kotick is a smart, smart guy... no matter how obnoxious he is or can be, and he knows if the price is too high, no one will play. If I have a game out there that millions of people are playing and I charge a dollar a month for people to play, they'll pay that because they figure it's nothing... but it all adds up. It all depends on what the charge is.. I don't think it's a good idea that will win people over because you pretty much spend $120 total to take full advantage of a game...not including system or accessories, or even Internet bill.


    I know the next game in the series is being developed by Sledgehammer developers who have created Dead Space (didn't like it), Ratchet and Clank (never heard of it), and Afro Samurai (no thanks).. so.. I guess my expectations really aren't that high, but... with Bobby Kotick in charge, I don't think he's going to give them room for much adjustments on controls and view of everything... he's going to want everything structured. But who knows? Maybe I'll be surprised.

Call of Duty: Black Ops? More Like "Beast Operation".

   It's been awhile since I wrote.. atleast that's how I feel.. and let me tell you guys, I've been wanting to write abut everything I knew about Black-Ops for.. forever, but I didn't want to create a post everyday being like "Hey guyz! Check this out!" Because quite honestly, I think everyone on my facebook is getting annoyed at me making the posts I do now about this blog, so forget about posting something everyday that may be only one sentence long.

   Sad to say... I wasn't at the midnight release... and there's several excuses as to why.
 1) My boyfriend didn't want to go and because we live together we're conjoined at the hip. so... I was stuck.
 2) My leg muscles were pulled more than a 100lb taffy does right before it gets formed.
 3) Well... my boyfriend made me choose between that or breakfast in the morning... and I was craving breakfast food.

   So... I knew they would bring back Zombies, I knew that they were going to enable splitscreen for multiplayer, and I knew they were going to have your class be... your class (unless someone steals it.. which already happened to me..).

  And I'm not sure if I made a post about this on here or if I was just ranting on some forums (I really can't tell the two apart..) but I did at one point or another say that CoD should do what Halo did and allow people to vote for the maps.. or to select which map they want to play on... and they listened!



 I was transformed into a cat that was photoshopped to look like it was smiling
  Okay, so everyone who has read this blog since Day 1... or even just starting now knows I'm a huge fan of Call of Duty. So... what do I think about the game? Weeeeeell...


     GRAPHX ::  Let's be real honest... the graphics.. are okay. They're not bad, but they're not the greatest graphics I've seen from the series.. then again, I'm playing the game on the Xbox360... so they may have compromised some detail in order to fit some other stuff into the game.. while the PS3 version probably has the ass-kicking graphics and some extra stuff thrown into the mix. The thing about this game also.. I think it was one of the developers who said this, I know it was someone on the project of the game, but they said the Developers actually had to cut down on the reality of the game abit because it was very bloody and gorey and just looked too realistic... which, I agree. One of the differences from Treyarch and Infinity Ward is the fact that if you're going to shoot someone in a Treyarch COD game, you're going to see limbs flying and magical gravity-defying, air-flowing streams of blood, which is... you guessed it - uhmayzin'.


     EAR DRUM YUMM ::   The sounds... and I mean the voice acting, the songs, and the effects are so realistic, it's scary. If you're climbing up onto something that's as high as your chest, you're going to hear your guy panting like a chain smoker doing a marathon.. ofcourse that may not be realistic because these guys are suppose to be Seals (I think).. and.. Seals are human machines, they're not normal people.. me? I would pant my ass off. But it's ear candy and it really makes up for some lack of detail within the graphics. I'm also really excited because they brought back some people from WaW to do voice acting and that is amazing.. and they really took it a step further.


    CAMPAIGN PLOT ::   The plot of the game is exciting, alot of twists, some turns, it keeps you guessing on what is going on.. and, they bring back an old character! (Which... took me forever to realize who is was, but I'm not going to spoil it.) You're all over the place in this game, you're in the Artic, you're in Cuba, you're in Vietnam, you're in Egypt (not really, unless I just haven't reached that point..). But the story and how it connects to WaW is so interesting and it's great story telling. Now, CoD is not really a game you want to buy when it comes to the campaign... there's not much replay value because the campaigns are a tad on the short side.. so when you spend 60 bucks for this, it's usually for the multiplayer aspect of it.. actually... bump that up to 120 bucks, because Xbox Live is going up 10 dollars. So... $120 to play this game and take full advantage... but, the campaign is great, short.. but great and doesn't lack any excitement.


    WHERE'S THE MAP? I'M THE MAP! ::   Now, I haven't experienced every single map there is in the game (I like to play campaign and get a feel of what the game would offer map-wise instead of just jumping in there like a blind bat). The maps are great... some of them could use some work but I think it's just a matter of getting used to them over time. There's none that are insanely small to where it's rare to actually play the map (Infinity Ward's MW2 Rust) but none of them are obsessively huge that makes you want to vomit on the controller. Yeah, I hear people saying "They don't have real sniper maps", well.. Highrise wasn't a "real" snipers map but I still took out my .50 and owned, so no excuses when it comes to that. And there is one small map, but it does have houses and multi-levels so there there is space in the map, not everything is out in the open.


    PEW PEW PEW ::   In WaW I was a Type100 fan.. in MW2, I was a Tar-21 fan, and you know what? I can't figure out which guns I like... they're all great though. Ofcourse, beginner classes suck.. but they're decent guns. I do think some of them are a tad overpowered already and I have used a Sniper Class which has a horrible recoil, but it's not insanely bad and time will come to where everyone will get used to the guns and be pros... and ofcourse when that happens, Sledgehammer will be released and we'll all suck again. One problem people *may* face is that it could take some time to actually bring the gun up on screen, so.. practice hip-firing.


    NEW HORIZONS ::   This game separates itself from not only other games in it's genre, but other games within the series. There's so many ideas with this game... if you're the type of person who does like the campaign and feel iffy about Multiplayer mode and taking advantage of that, they have a mode where you can play with AI and so it simulates multiplayer, which is very cool. There's new game modes, some wager matches where you can gamble points if you're that much of a COD addict to where you can't go to Atlantic City... or Las Vegas... or are just 12 years old and want to see why you dad pawn'd your mother's engagement ring. New Killstreaks but Treyarch was smart and did continue to allow people to choose the killstreaks they wanted (3, 5, 7 Killstreaks just doesn't cut it anymore, we've gone hardcore).





   Your class is really your class, you earn points just by playing, completing Contracts, or any other ways and choose which perks you want instead of waiting for a specific one to be unlocked. You see on the screen that your character's uniform changes depending of which perks you have.. they just offer everything new and complete. Even to have the ability of recording your own games and sharing them in a community is great (Yeah, I understand Halo has it, but it's not the same..)



      OVERALL :: 9/10   I have to give this game a 9 out of 10, not because I'm biased (which I try not to be, and I will also try to stop using parenthesis), but the game offers so many new opportunities in the world of gaming and it's offered a new perspective on what a game should be.. it's not a shooter game where it just shows you your KD and WL ratio, it shows you how many points you earn a minute, how many bombs you defuse. It allows you to play with friends and it's a game that will cater to those who do consider themselves hardcore gamers and those who are just casual gamers and you do not see that very often for games in this genre. However, the game just came out and there are some issues.. especially on the computer (from what I hear..).. just the fact that it is a bit laggy without anything having to do with internet connection.. but there are patches that are to be released, so.. that will make computer-dwellers happy. But anyway, I really think that this is the game that will take the idea of FPS further... sorry Halo Fans, sure... I'll agree with you, Halo "pioneered" FPS, but this game is going to create an Army of Perfection when it comes to this genre.

  PS: I compromised the length and/or detail of the blog due to my urge to continue playing Call of Duty: Black-Ops

Xbox360 - The average chick who wished she was hot

 So my mom-mom (grandmother for those who don't know) moved in officially yesterday.. So I wasn't able to just wake up and be able to access my Xbox Live, also.. I was rearranging the whole upstairs for my boyfriend for his birthday (who said romance was dead?).. and because Comcast was down.. so, alot of things were really fighting against me..

 But when I was able to look at it with my boyfriend at night.. I was terrified. The transition of my face was like:





 And how dare you, Microsoft. How dare you make me have my face turn to beyond what I thought was impossible in such timing. It was so weird.. I knew I was expecting a slight makeover.. you know, some designes here and there, a bit of make-up and hair spray.. nope.. this Xbox Skank got a whole liposuction and face lift procedure.

  After several years of using the same layout.. sure, we grew to love it and could even navigate through it with out eyes closed, and that's probably why this new one it's slightly complicated.. but still. Does anyone remember when facebook got a "makeover"? You should, it happened within the past year, everyone was making groups about how facebook needed to change their new layout back to the old one, but then we understood the new layout and I'm sure now we just like it more now than what we did the whole one because of all the functions. I guess it's like this... somewhat. I still don't like it.

  While the color and the designs are nice, they redid the characters.. and now they just look weird. Has anyone actually seen a person walking around with a head bigger than their own body? Because if you have, they're probably ethiopians and they have health issues.. it's not healthy to have a giant sphere resting on a tiny stick figure.. why do you think lollipops break so easily?
   But the people are just.. weird looking, the loading logo is annoying looking and it pauses and it's downright frustrating when you have a clip of something and it doesn't repeate smoothly. It's like in the old days of myspace when people would try to make glowing images but it didn't flow right... it's annoying. If you can't do a glow right, or a motion, get off and get someone else who can. I don't have a degree in graphic arts or developing software, but I can sure as hell make a looping image flow smoother than Microsoft can.

    But the job of the dashboard or loading screen is to get you to get pumped about killing some people.. or playing simple casual games, whichever... and this doesn't do that for me. I just feel like staring at it and getting completely hit in the face with a big paddle of peice of crap designing repeatedly. Like I've said in previous posts... it's like two dogs humping, you don't want to look at it, but you can't stop.


    (I was thinking of looking up a picture and having it here, but I'm not into that so I refrained. Some things I will just not do for this blog.)
 
   With the new xbox thing, I just don't know what to think. It'll always be in the middle of the Wii and the PS3 as far as aesthetics are concerned.. and I think it's trying to copy the sleek and high-tech look that the PS3 Menu has.. but, it just doesn't work, and that's why I have to slap it with the good 'ol FAIL stamp. The menu was fine before.. it didn't need to be changed and I think they're selling themselves in a superficial way in order to try and keep up with competitiors.. I mean, come on.. the Holidays are around the corner, Xbox is awesome, but PS3 is newer and it's coming out with the same new accessories that the 360 is coming with that took years for it to get. So.. I don't know.. I suppose I'll have to go through the Dashboard, get used to it and then I'll quit complaining... or maybe I'll just find something else to nag about, who knows?

Video Game Cliche'

   I've played all types of games, maybe not as much as other people out there, but I still enjoy games and I love writing about them, but you know you play a few games in one genre, you'd played them all because they all offer the same cliche's.


     1. You're a Hero:  We get it.. you're an orphan or have some short-term memory loss problem, and guess what? You're the hero and have to deal with other peoples problems. For some odd reason, most RPGs start like this, although they're drifting to different beginnings for the sake of shaking away the cliche.. TOO LATE! We google the game and expect it to start as us being the underdog.. although everyone loves the underdog, that doesn't mean we want to be it and spend 3 hours of gameplay trying to prove to the pixel world how we're a great ninja/warrior/savior of the land..

      which brings me to..

     2. The Village of Idiots  Guess who can help you for when you need some backup...no one. Because every person in every community in every single damn world in every galaxy, is a moron who needs your help to tackle the super secret mastermind who got out of it's cage: the chicken. They also need your help doing dishes, telling their ghost children to go into the light, and to figure out what they should name their dog. You can't rely on these people for battle and you can't rely on them to give you much experience for gameplay either.. so, developers: Why are they there?



 Idiot Villager... Useless.. Stupid.. Happy... Smiling.. Moron.   
     3. Pornstars Don't Belong in the Gaming Industry    It's in Final Fantasy, it's in Street Fighter, 80% sure in Duke Nukem, anything Rockstar, and yes, you guessed it, it's that person that is wearing so little rags, that if they didn't have an awesome body they could be taken for as a hobo. Video games aren't just played by 17 year olds who have as much sexual control as a rabbit, they're mostly played by NORMAL people, and people that don't need video games in order to get the the Wonderland.. (that's what the internet is for). Keep the games clean, you can have blood, guts, and as much gore that even Saw would get jealous, but why do you need the boobs and other parts? You don't. Time to grow up, Developers... then maybe your wives won't kick you to the couch and you can stop fantasizing during work.
    PS: I've also saw this on other sites... see? Males can get annoyed at seeing digital breasts too.



    One Word: Skank.

     4. They're the Villain.. oh, No they're not..    When there's a hero, there's a villain.. and this works in two distinctive ways. One way is that you think the most obvious bad guy is the main bad guy but then a twist is thrown into the mix and suddenly he's not the main bad guy but someone else is... and this usually fails and just makes the player go "what the holy grail". The second way this works is that there's a guy who appears to be evil, but then he gives his reasoning on why he did what he did and suddenly, he doesn't appear evil anymore... and that's more annoying because the developers make it so you have to fix all the problems he caused anyway... even after everything. Whatever happened to a fire-breathing dragon being the evil thing and then magically slaying him at the end? Do games still work like that? Or did great grandpa's folk storytelling ruin the gaming industry of that?


     5. Que Amazing Song When Stuff is About to go Down    I call this the "Rugrat Syndrome"... you know how when Tommy Pickles pulls out the screwdriver, an adventure is about to happen? Well, this is what that is like... you hear epic background music and you know there's about to be an adventure burning into your eyeballs right from your tv set. This is a bit of a hit-or-miss for me... it can either be really stupid, or it can knock my socks off like what RedDeadRedemption did... now, not only did that have good songs, but they did it at all the right moments and that's it... the Developers understood that not every mission that made you go out of town had to have a song accompany it, and that's what made the moments that did have the songs come on so special.. because it was rare and those songs were amazing. 

 
    6. Aliens are Bad   We see it in Halo, we see it in DeadSpace, we see it on tv... and I'm sure everyone gets it.. Aliens are bad. Don't make deals with them, don't marry them... and for God's Sake do not have their children (Woman from MenInBlack, I'm talking to you, your baby did not need to throw up on the Fresh Prince's face, that is a galactic sin). Every game that deals with aliens talk about how horrible they are and have you kill them.. and it makes you think... these are things in games that have an IQ so high, the alien cows are suppose to make you look dumb, so... how do you kill something like that? I understand it's all a fantasy, blahblahblah, but it's a dumb one. Developers, throw the alien idea in the trash... no one is amused. The only reason why the "alien" thing sells is because people like to compare the difference of developer's ideas of what aliens should look like... and really, they all look like big-headed green things with big eyes and wear metallic suits so our government doesn't pick up their signals, other than that, there's nothing else.



 Featuring: The Type of Aliens us '90 Kids grew up With.



    7. "Nothing is what it used to be"   Thank God for the past... that's when God had a connection to Earth, that's when people had morals, great weapons, amazing rulers and heroes, EVERYTHING happened in the past, and now your present in doomed and your future is nonexistant. This is what the gaming industry feeds off of, the idea that everything is not what it was before and everything in the past was much better than it is today and you're the one that they've been waiting for in order to turn everything around.. yeah, yeah... I know, this slightly falls under the whole disabled-from-the-waist-down Hero thing, but not really. But this is what happens, even in Fable III... your father was a legendary hero until he died, your sibling takes over and runs the whole kindom to hell, and all anyone can do is remind you that you have to fill your fathers shoes and be the Hero people need you to be... when you even speak in Fable it calls you "Hero" in the subtitles. I swear, sometimes dead people wear the biggest shoes known to man.





      Yeah, cliches are made up of good ideas, but they're good ideas that could die fast and easily be overrated... like knights fighting dragons, princes saving princesses, Snorlax laying in your way and having to play a flute... it's all the same stuff, and while I'm sure there's more cliches out there, these are the first seven I could name off the top of my head and some I had to think of. If you think I missed any, let me know and maybe I'll consider doing a Pt. 2.

**UPDATED** Fable 3: Third Time's a Charm **UPDATED**

    So the boy and I bought Fable 3 today, and let me tell you, it's something to invest in (so far, I only played the game for 3 hours until the boyfriend took over, so who knows? Something in the game might piss me off later down the road but until then, I like it). Now, I've played Fable I and I wasn't a huge fan of it, my boyfriend wouldn't let me look at, let alone touch, Fable 2 because it was so "horrible"... and Fable 3? Definately something that could convert the Fable-nonbeliever.

   There's so much stuff in the game you could do... and I'm at the part where things seemed to be repetitive, you know... you run around, you do favors for people while they do nothing for you, and then surprise! It ends up not being boring like other games, the minigames involved in the game really makes such a great gaming experience and the way your character is really your character is entertaining.

       I give this game a 8.50/10
           It's easy but not too easy to where it can get extremely boring, so.. it's a good game from gurus to nubs and offers a variety of mini games to keep your gamer mind attracted. The game overall is great and worth the money... you don't have to worry about playing the whole game through and then throwing it on the shelf once you finish it, it does have replay value from what I've seen so far and for gamers, that should always be a delight (most people don't think gamers care about money... but realistically, we save every penny we find to buy a game every week).

    The Pros about this game::        - Have Your Own Business
        - Get Married
        - Choose your Gender
        - Have Kids or Pull a Brangelina and Adopt a Whole Village
        - Choose to be Good, Bad, or in Between
        - Customize your Character Along the Way
        - Easy to make Money so No Worrying About Spending it and Losing it Forever
        - The Dog (I'm a dog person, what can I say?)
        - Minigames
        - Interact with your Friends Online with your Characters
        - *Option* Make your own Character Online and have it in the Game
        - The Graphics: (landscapes, characters, towns, etc.)

     The Negatives of this game::
       - The Graphics Sometimes aren't in tune with Sound Effects
        - Game Play *can* Become Insanely Sluggish
        - The Menu and Button Setting can Take Time to get Used to
        - It's only for the Xbox360 (sorry PS3 enthusiasts).
 

        As I said, the game is entertaining and you get your money's worth. Who couldn't love that? However, I know I didn't beat the game yet, so we'll see how I feel after a few days and I'll report back here to tell if my opinions have changed or remain the same. **I won't be posting a new post, just updating this one, so look out for that.)

_____________________________________________________________


        Hey guys! Okay, so I beat the game and I have to say, I still give it an 8.50. The story and all the missions were great, I could've settled for one more big city mission except for dealing with only... 3 big missions and cities? But eh, every game like this settles for just 3 big missions these days. Close to the end.. there's a bit of a surprise... for me there was anyway. When I expected the game to end, it didn't! And it kept on going. Another great thing about this game, even when the credits are done rolling.. you're still playing. Not sure if they had it in previous Fable's but I love the idea of just running around and now being about to do whatever.

        This time around, I'm going to be an evil person.. (would it be cliche if I put in a "muahuahua" right here?). So I'll see what the story is like this time around.. if it changes or if certain advents are replaced. That will be fun to see what the developers did with that.

Pet Peeves in Gaming

     The gaming world is filled with surprises.. different personalities, ideas, habits, methods.. etc, the list goes on. But some things are just CRAZY ANNOYING.. and here, I will explain them and then hopefully everyone will live by them and be careful to never ever piss me off (because in reality, everyone should live and breathe this blog). 



It's consuming her soul..

      1. Inviting the Unwanted
    I'm all for starting up parties and playing with friends, but have some manners and ask everyone else in the party if it is okay to invite a few people, especially when you aren't the person hosting the party anyway. Personally... in COD, I don't care, I like GroundWar, but there's some people on my friends lists who I can't stand and I rather not deal with them at all.. and before anyone writes a comment, muting them isn't enough. So people, don't be obnoxious, ask people if it's okay to bring someone in before doing so.. it's just common courtesy.


      2. You've been killed by: TheKillerWhale
     I love unique names and awesome names, but I don't want to be killed by the BraveLittleToaster. Or TheEngineWhoCould. Usernames with a buttload of numbers in them are also annoying, and more so because.. it's number. It's not attractive. Everyone should be able to think up of a username that doesn't consist of "358735". Also, the more X's you have in your username, the more officially annoying you are. Which, speakin of usernames or gamertags, why are people modding theirs? If you don't like your name, just ask people to report you and recreate a new one.. your name doesn't need to consist of curse words or rainbows.


     3. Hidden Clan Tag Messages
    I see this ALL the time, a guy has to have a penis or a person bending over as their clan tag, and it's so... stupid. You must really like penis in order to try to and make the shape of it as your clan tag and flaunt it around for thousands of people to see. I don't think guys understand what they seem like whenever they do this. And the person-bending-over clantag? Again, that could be a guy for all I know because there's no curves or anything. There's also the clan tag with the gun, which... that's alot cooler than the penis one, but still annoying. And also when people have "sexy" or curse words as their clan tag or username... I could go on about this all day, but how hard are you working your tiny little brain and how much time are you spending to try and get pass the filter just to curse? Is it even worth it? Noooo. There's no pink mystical unicorn presenting you a box of chocolates if you can succeed getting past censors and filters.

           < There was suppose to be a pic inserted here but I couldn't find a Unicorn presenting chocolates to a nub >

     4. RPG-7 = Retarded&Pathetic Gamers who are 7. (CoD)
    No one should use this... at all. My idea for grenade launchers? Make them lock on to an automobile or something instead of free shooting. Can I take my stinger out and shoot someone in the face? Noooo. So.. what is the difference between that and the RPG? Nothing, IRL. So why is there a difference within the game that prides itself on being "realistic"? Exactly. They may have changed it up to give gamers more options, but give them more options by giving them equality, if you're going to have a grenade launcher shoot freely without lock-ons, allow the others to do that as well.


    5. Take the mic out of your throat.
   Scientists could conduct a study of what the difference is between counties and how they use their mics, but I'll save them from spending all their money and time and I'll just say it here.
   USA: Mic away from mouth and shouting/yelling
   Canada: Mic away from mouth and whispering
   UK: Mic in their throat and shouting/yelling.
 And that's completely accurate. If you've been in a lobby with Americans and people from the UK, they're in a constant screaming match, the only difference is that you can understand what the American is saying because they don't have their mic so close to their mouth where it sounds like white noise. And Canadians.. you can't hear them either way, so that doesn't matter; the loudest I've ever heard a Canadian, it was at the same level as an American whispering. Either way, 2/3 of people are screaming into their mics and it's ridiculous, I feel bad for those who have TurtleBeaches because they have to hear the annoyances 2x greater than what I have to on regular cheapo headsets.


    6.  Horrible Hosting..
   I hope whoever reads this, spams the mailboxes of the creators of COD, because they need to pay attention to this one: Instead of just settling for ANY host, get a good host. I am, as I'm sure other gamers, are willing to wait 1 minute in a lobby to get an amazing host, rather than spend 15 seconds in a lobby and get a crappy host and have that "Waiting for new host..." window every five seconds because some idiot person can't replace his hamster-in-a-wheel device for a REAL router.


   7. Save an Eardrum, Don't Sing
   I am so guilty of doing this that it is ridiculous... but I do it to have fun and goof around, but I can't stand it when I'm in a yelling match with someone (I'm from Jersey, US of A), and someone is singing "WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS!!???" it makes me want to hop through the Ethernet cable and beat their hippie-humpin asses. But, again... I sing worst songs, like "That's Amore" by Dean Martin... love that song. But if you were to be the next Rihanna or Usher, you would be singing infront of producers, not to idiots on Xbox Live. So don't sing, don't rap, don't do anything other than talking. Also... no blaring the radio, that's just dumb. It comes through the speakers all fuzzy and white noise-ish and it doesn't sound good.

  

    8. "Wasn't Me!"
   We've all kicked someones ass in a game at one point or another... and ofcourse they always say "that was my friend playing, not me.". No, it was not your friend, it was you, and you know what? Personally, if I had friends over, the last thing I would be doing is playing video games or being on the laptop joking around... that is obnoxioussss. When I have friends around, we go to the gym, walk around, run errands together, and possibly go out for lunch. Drop the act, you suck... end of story. And here's a question... you have your friend over, you probably don't live together... if they're coming over to spend time with you, why are you going to put a headset on and talk to other people?

   
    9. Modding: Why Brag?
   Now... I have a good story for this. Me and my friends (and an idiot someone invited in, for the sake of it, we'll call him PileOfPoop), we got into a lobby.. played the game, in the game he was bragging how he bought a mod, now.. these guys we were playing against were pretty good, but we won, and PileOfPoop, out of everyone, goes and says "Nice modding _____". And I can't have that, so I call him out on it, "You just bragged that you bought a mod". His reply? "It's a bad mod"... seriously? You spent the money to buy a mod in the first place and try to talk trash and say it's a bad mod? Get outta here. Needless to say, modding isn't cool.. and neither is bragging about it. I always get into lobbys these days that has some Try Hard bragging how he has a mod and aim bot.

   10: Real Men Insult Women, Apparently.
   I always get called things... all the time. Lesbian, butch, bitch, and some other things which are explicit... and I also have witty comments for them, but these guys are stupid. They meet a girl on xbox and their instinct is to disrespect her? Where's the love? If I was a guy on xbox, I would rather play with a girl than a guy.. but nope. These guys want the full on guy action... or gay action. Whichever. And it's sad.. would these guys want other guys to talk about their moms like that? or daughters if they had any? I've had guys say "Hey! That's a girl! It's fat chick thursday!". Fat? I don't even like junkfood, the only junkfood I like is soul food and that's mac and cheese and I make it without butter, thankyou. (You cut over 1000 calories a serving if you make it the way I make it.. and it tastes good). Grow up boys... once you get past the "cootie stage", the world is way better and more likely to listen to your dribble.


 

    I'm sure as I continue gaming and venture off into other worlds, I'll find more things that irritate me.. but I guess what everyone can learn from this is I can't stand people and I especially can't stand people who act all big and bold because 1,000+ miles is seperating us.

Popular Misconceptions Pt. 2 - Stereotypes

 If you read my Popular Misconceptions entry, you would see that I talk about how girls do play video games despite popular belief, and how they get called "fat", "ugly", and "stupid".. but I never actually put in any detail of the type of stereotypes that come with girl gaming... only the public's general idea that every girl gamer out there is obese. Now, alot of people may scratch their heads and say "what kind of stereotypes are there with girl gamers?" and there's alot... it's the same with guy gamers, except no one cares about them.. so, let me just give the different stereotypes that surround girl gamers.

The Ladies:

 When it comes to stereotypes of girl gamers, I've seen them all.. the "try-to-be-a-gamer" gamer, the "typical" gamer, the "casual", and even the "Jap-fan" gamer... I've read of them all and dealt with them all, but this is my own list of the popular stereotypes, the forgotten stereotypes, and the newcomers.

The "Try-Hard" Gamer:  
Being spotted having usernames like xXsxyXcutieXx and BlondGRL4U, these are the types of girls that are usually shunned by the "hardcore" girl gamers, any other type of girl gamers out there. By taking promiscuous photos of themselves and talking about their pillow fights over their bestie's house last night, these girls try to distract their peers from paying attention to how much they actually suck at games and to focus on the overall picture that a possibly attractive girl has a gaming controller in her hand.
  You will mostly spot these girls on Live Uno, anything that tests the hand-eye coordination (RockBand, Guitar Hero..), and some will try to claim that they play FPS and that they're "serious business". The best way to get rid of them and shut them up is to come up with something witty to say, that will keep them quiet for the rest of the game. If you want to look up these girls, go to myspace... you'll see a bunch of them having bright pictures with consoles, controls, and games in order to appear "hardcore" and to try and have people strike up a conversation with them on what their favorite game is... only to say that they love "old school anything"... yet they don't even know what a NES is.. *smh*

      The Infamous Fat Girl Gamer:
  The *Most Annoying* girl gamer stereotype out there and the most popular is the fat chick.. but let's be honest, who really looks like this? No one. Probably 1 out of every 1,000 girl gamers look like this... seriously, I bet there are more people who get killed in Africa by bees than there are of female gamers who look like this... 300lbs and all. Let's look at reality and science... you are what you eat, if you eat junk/unhealthy foods nonstop on top of living an inactive lifestyle, you're going to clog up your brain as well as your body, your brain isn't going to be at full potential... so how on Earth is someone who eats THAT much and has that big of a percentage of body fat going to have a high reaction time and to move their thumbs quick enough in order to kill people? Not to mention, this is probably one of those "fat models" that have webcam shows and get paid by males to dress/act/do whatever and one of her clients told her to steal her cousins gaming equipment and to wear it.
  I'm not dissing the big folk, I understand it's not a funny issue and there's a ton of factors that are to be counted for, but let's get rid of the whole "fat girl" image for female gamers, because it's way worst for men and more typical than it is for women, especially since most female gamers are on the Wii playing Mario-whatever instead of FPS.


           Which brings me to..

The "Health Nut" Girl Gamer:
  Working out is good, there is nothing better than working out. It makes you happier, healthier, and for me... just more tolerant to other people that I usually wouldn't be able to stand on a regular basis.. but there is one problem... some girls seems to think that performing certain motions is equal to 2 hours at the gym... it's not. You need resistance (more than just gravity on your body weight).
  These girls aren't all that mainstream, but hey.. someone has to be buying WiiFit, and I don't think it's guys.
   Now, I went to a website and it pretty much did the sales pitch of "pay for a gym membership but never use it? Wait for a perfect cold day to workout outside but find out it gets hot too quickly? Use the WiiFit in your very own home!" Nooo. Get off your ass and go to the gym.. Rule 1 of Losing Weight: Don't be lazy, you want to be toned and healthy? Get to the gym.
   Now, these are the girls that probably have a secret shrine of health games... EA Sports Workout-whatever, Jillian Michaels workout-whatever game (can't bash on her, she's one of my idols..), and if you dig real far back, you'll see Healthy Cooking.. and if you see this, you better start running.. Low Fat, Low Sugar Recipes.

   A Message to Men: Only pursuit if you want your manhood taken away. While dating someone who cares about health and appearance is attractive, she can't cook. So.. you either keep your mom around and let her do the cooking, or sneak off in a dark corner eating Chinese food.. because you know this girl isn't going to allow take-out and will throw out any trace of it.

       The "Butch" Girl Gamer:   I laughed the first time I was called a Justin Bieber look-a-like butch lesbian girl gamer... it's kind of like the thing with the "fat girl gamer" where guys want to use aesthetics against you because they can't say anything about your intelligence since it surpasses theirs.. -cough-, but has anyone seen a girl who looks like this? Because I haven't, and this person in the photo is an exception, she's from a reality show, so it doesn't count... but I've looked up hundreds of photos of girl gamers from conventions and competitions, and while I can't see if they're lesbian or not, I know that they didn't look like this. I've also seen lesbian gamers and the worst lesbian gamer I've seen.. she was thick.. not really fat, but curvy, and she had colorful dreads in her hair and sharpie-d eyebrows, pretty much something you would find on vampirefreaks.com but without the corset or doing much upper body work.

   Here's the thing though.. and guys don't realize what they're saying when they're attacking people with stupid remarks, if I'm a fat girl gamer, or a butch girl gamer, and you just lost to me.. that makes it all worst, don't you think?
   But anyway..
  If these girls exist, they're busy playing FPS, Skate1-3, and..- no, no... these girls probably play video games because their friends do, otherwise I really think they're off their ass and skating for real... who plays a skateboard game when they could probably do it outside? Beings that they're butch, it's something they probably do.. sports and stuff, and what's the fun of playing in on a console when you can do it for real? These girls aren't big in the game industry, better to let the stereotype die.

   The "FanGirl" Gamer:
    There's two types of fangirls, however... both are calmer than any fanboy out there and do not get into screaming matches on why a game is good.
 FanGirl A: Usually just buys a game t-shirt and takes a photo with her face and a game in order to show her dedication.
 FanGirl B: Girls that show up at conventions dressed as their favorite character (Rikku is most popular)... and yes, they went as far as to hire someone to make this outfit. if you want to get with this type of girl, just ask her how long it took her to make her outfit, she'll love it. 
     Fangirls can be found in a variety of locations, in a local arcade or game store, or on their fav. game's forums, figuring out what the opening track is so that they can download it as their main ringtone.

     The "Hardcore" Girl Gamer:
  It's 3 in the morning, her eyes are blood red, and the rest of her clan/friends went to bed five minutes ago for the competition/clan match tomorrow, she is the Hardcore gamer and at her damn tiredest, she can still kick your ass. Unlike the casual gamer, you won't see her hoeing it up on Farmville but instead ripping through zombies, slaying dragons, and killing any person who's body is hanging out even an inch from a corner on the other side of the map.
   These girls need the best of everything when it comes to gaming, a tv screen instead of a monitor, dual video cards, and every gaming console out there in order to fill her need for gaming.
   If you see them outside of the house, they're either filling up on energy with carbonated horse pee, or waiting outside to buy their game so they can zoom up to the top of the ranks.

   Message to Guys:  If approached, you might feel emotional abandonment.

     The "Casual" Gamer:
  There's a few types of casual girl gamers.
        Casual GG 1: Owns a few handheld gaming consoles and a few regular consoles. She plays Mario-anything and Ledend of Zelda, maybe you'll even find a Yoshi's Story laying around somewhere in her room, in other words... no shooters.
        Casual GG 2: She is the evolved version of GG1, while she has a few shooters, the most realistic she can get in to GoldenEye007... if you know her, you're lucky, she's most likely to have a FF7 laying around somewhere.
        Casual GG 3: She loves The Sims, Zoo Tycoon, and anything that has to deal with management and simulation, obviously... doesn't venture much from those genres and will be guilty of going to bigfishgames.com and purchasing a few of their time management games.
        Casual GG 4: Don't expect much from this gamer, she's as much of a gamer as I am at being a Las Vegas cross dresser. You'll find her flooding your facebook wall with crap about Farmville and any other Zynga game there in out there.  There is one good thing about this girl though, she's a pro when it comes to phone games, especially solitare or bejweled.. best there is out there.




    In the end, who cares what kind of gamer you or someone you know is? As long as you have fun (and that's what it's for) no one else should matter. And yes, I was going to do guy stereotypes but I couldn't stand seeing this article in my Drafts anymore.. so here it is. Maybe soon I'll write something on stereotypes on guy gamers, even though there's only so many times I could write e gangster, dumb frat boy, and retro nerd before I get bored and move onto something else... like girls who beat their guys at video games ;].  -sigh- male egos..